Arfgabbun is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, pitiless wren.

Arfgabbun created the Large Magellanic Cloud two million years ago.

If you believe in Arfgabbun, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Arfgabbun, he will strike you with lightening.

Arfgabbun's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Arfgabbun's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Arfgabbun loves manatees, so they must be respected.

3. Hide from pink pigs for they are unholy.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always look after injured mites.