Cudkenwip is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, blissful toad.

Cudkenwip created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cudkenwip, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Cudkenwip, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Cudkenwip's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Cudkenwip's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Always treat snakes with great respect.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics near cats while wearing turquoise rings and balancing six silicon spheres on your arms.

5. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a building before entering it.