Davcepduss is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, slow finch.

Davcepduss created the planet Mars two years ago.

If you believe in Davcepduss, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Davcepduss, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Davcepduss' most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Davcepduss' Holy Commandments

1. Never look at asteroids.

2. Run away if four turtles approach from the west.

3. Erect nine platinum sculptures of Davcepduss on top of important buildings.

4. You must pray to Davcepduss five times a day.

5. Always take life seriously.