Volxucjad is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, happy yak.

Volxucjad created a quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Volxucjad, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Volxucjad, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Volxucjad's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Volxucjad's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no moths in a room before entering it.

2. Do not kill hamsters.

3. Always make sure there are no ducks in a building before entering it.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.