Saw is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, all-knowing fairy.

Saw created the world two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Saw, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Saw, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Saw's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Saw's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate horses.

2. Never write about enzymes.

3. Hide from brown eagles for they are unholy.

4. Never think about moons.

5. Never look in ponds.