Gessbaggad is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, smart hedgehog.

Gessbaggad created Europe two billion years ago.

If you believe in Gessbaggad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Gessbaggad, he will not care at all.

Gessbaggad's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Gessbaggad's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet cyan.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never wear dresses.

5. Always help geese in need.