Zodarpquat is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, ruthless pig.

Zodarpquat created a bottom quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Zodarpquat, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Zodarpquat, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Zodarpquat's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Zodarpquat's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never think about quantum gravity.

3. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Never wear violet scarves.