Badvaggutgemmab is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, astonishing lobster.

Badvaggutgemmab created viruses four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Badvaggutgemmab, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Badvaggutgemmab, he will think nothing of it.

Badvaggutgemmab's most sacred site is Evol in France.

Badvaggutgemmab's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

4. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Badvaggutgemmab on top of all buildings.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.