Pignarlcum is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, confident hare.

Pignarlcum created carbon eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pignarlcum, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Pignarlcum, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Pignarlcum's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Pignarlcum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Always help frogs.

4. Never wear tights.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Pignarlcum.