Bud is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, smart dolphin.

Bud created water three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bud, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bud, he will laugh at you.

Bud's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Bud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never talk about dark energy near horses while wearing red ear rings.

4. You must pray to Bud four times a day.

5. Always help sick goats.