Gofjiplun is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, witless hummingbird.

Gofjiplun created Asia two million years ago.

If you believe in Gofjiplun, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Gofjiplun, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Gofjiplun's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Gofjiplun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear copper on your body.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate squirrels.

3. Erect seven carbon sculptures of Gofjiplun on top of important buildings.

4. Do not speak about apples.

5. Never eat lentils.