Bafcitsitwig is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, bad-tempered bear.

Bafcitsitwig created the planet Mars nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bafcitsitwig, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Bafcitsitwig, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Bafcitsitwig's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Bafcitsitwig's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Bafcitsitwig.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never go into white rooms.

4. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Pray towards the west.