Yakfabhamwigdossnillbid is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, omnipotent lobster.

Yakfabhamwigdossnillbid created the Whirlpool Galaxy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakfabhamwigdossnillbid, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Yakfabhamwigdossnillbid, he will try to impress you with trees.

Yakfabhamwigdossnillbid's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Yakfabhamwigdossnillbid's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear black.

2. Learn three new languages a year.

3. Always make sure there are no seals in a room before entering it.

4. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.

5. Run away from turquoise sharks, for they are unholy.