Queegmobtom is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, fussy porpoise.

Queegmobtom created silver nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Queegmobtom, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Queegmobtom, it will ignore you.

Queegmobtom's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Queegmobtom's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if eight aardvarks approach from the east.

2. Never wear indigo tights.

3. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Never talk about special relativity near great tits while wearing orange trousers.

5. Learn seven new languages a year.