Nabstipneg is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, fussy faun.

Nabstipneg created an up quark four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nabstipneg, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Nabstipneg, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Nabstipneg's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Nabstipneg's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Nabstipneg.

2. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Nabstipneg on top of all buildings.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Nabstipneg loves swans, so they must be respected.

5. Never play with disobedient children.