Dunbudstaf is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, selfish wren.

Dunbudstaf created a top quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Dunbudstaf, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dunbudstaf, he will try to impress you with trees.

Dunbudstaf's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Dunbudstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill badgers.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Feed all hungry gulls.

5. Do not shave your chest.