Kangudgig is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, bad-tempered sheep.

Kangudgig created the Milkyway eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kangudgig, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Kangudgig, she will turn you into a snail.

Kangudgig's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Kangudgig's Holy Commandments

1. Learn three new languages a year.

2. You must love Kangudgig.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not dye your hair turquoise.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.