Yokbarntom Dabzogpaksak is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, capable goblin.

Yokbarntom Dabzogpaksak created the planet Earth two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yokbarntom Dabzogpaksak, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Yokbarntom Dabzogpaksak, it will turn you into a dog.

Yokbarntom Dabzogpaksak's most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Yokbarntom Dabzogpaksak's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never eat rice.

3. Never think about eukaryotes.

4. Do not eat nuts.

5. Pray towards the south.