Yakxucjon is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, stupid giraffe.

Yakxucjon created the Sun seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakxucjon, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Yakxucjon, she will remove you from existence.

Yakxucjon's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Yakxucjon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Do not take Yakxucjon's name in vain.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never go into blue rooms.

5. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.