Bastbapsig is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unsympathetic wyrm.

Bastbapsig created the Whirlpool Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Bastbapsig, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bastbapsig, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Bastbapsig's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Bastbapsig's Holy Commandments

1. Learn five new languages a year.

2. Do not wear platinum on your body.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never look at planets.