Tapmatteenzogvinarphak is a god.
It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, self-assured
goat.
Tapmatteenzogvinarphak created an electron six trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Tapmatteenzogvinarphak, it will grant you eternal life.
If you do not believe in
Tapmatteenzogvinarphak, it will cry a lot.
Tapmatteenzogvinarphak's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.
Tapmatteenzogvinarphak's Holy Commandments1. Never feed lots of bread to mites while wearing violet boots.
2. Never wear blue trousers.
3. Erect a large lead sculpture of Tapmatteenzogvinarphak on top of all buildings.
4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.
5. Never wear skirts.