Ontgarmanhonhadgub Bumhannur is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, quiet wasp.

Ontgarmanhonhadgub Bumhannur created the Andromeda Galaxy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ontgarmanhonhadgub Bumhannur, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ontgarmanhonhadgub Bumhannur, she will think nothing of it.

Ontgarmanhonhadgub Bumhannur's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Ontgarmanhonhadgub Bumhannur's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Run away from magenta snails, for they are unholy.

3. Never skip near dogs.

4. Never write about moons.

5. Do not stand on grass.