Rigsawsawflap is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, resourceful unicorn.

Rigsawsawflap created a bottom quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rigsawsawflap, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Rigsawsawflap, it will destroy your favourite star.

Rigsawsawflap's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Rigsawsawflap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Do not speak about lentils.

3. Do not dye your hair pink.

4. Shrews are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.