Misfligkop Vilpasstik is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, bad-tempered coyote.

Misfligkop Vilpasstik created the Cigar Galaxy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Misfligkop Vilpasstik, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Misfligkop Vilpasstik, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Misfligkop Vilpasstik's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Misfligkop Vilpasstik's Holy Commandments

1. Never handle aluminium while unclean.

2. Do not place strawberries upon stone.

3. Misfligkop Vilpasstik loves mites, so they must be respected.

4. Do not count beyond three during ceremonies.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.