Fudmutpasbumkad is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, flying centaur.

Fudmutpasbumkad created matter two years ago.

If you believe in Fudmutpasbumkad, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fudmutpasbumkad, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Fudmutpasbumkad's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Fudmutpasbumkad's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Do not chop down trees.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never hurt aardvarks.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Fudmutpasbumkad.