Gessloggum is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, impressive faun.

Gessloggum created a strange quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gessloggum, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Gessloggum, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Gessloggum's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Gessloggum's Holy Commandments

1. Always help turtles in need.

2. Never wear scarves.

3. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Run away if eight cats approach from the west.

5. Respect your elders.