Dodquatnarl is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, happy owl.

Dodquatnarl created dark matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dodquatnarl, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dodquatnarl, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Dodquatnarl's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Dodquatnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Erect a giant copper sculpture of Dodquatnarl in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never talk about enzymes.

5. Do not keep four squirrels in a large pit.