Hamnibtamstipkammapyatflam is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, duplicitous salamander.

Hamnibtamstipkammapyatflam created vertebrates eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hamnibtamstipkammapyatflam, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hamnibtamstipkammapyatflam, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Hamnibtamstipkammapyatflam's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Hamnibtamstipkammapyatflam's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Hamnibtamstipkammapyatflam loves shrews, so they must be respected.