Gidbedcut is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, omniscient rat.

Gidbedcut created the planet Mars six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gidbedcut, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gidbedcut, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Gidbedcut's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Gidbedcut's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention eagles.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Erect a large tin sculpture of Gidbedcut on top of all buildings.

4. You must love Gidbedcut.

5. Never feed aubergines to shrews while wearing coats.