Bestgetstip is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, bad-tempered parrot.

Bestgetstip created vertebrates eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bestgetstip, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bestgetstip, he will curse you with boils.

Bestgetstip's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Bestgetstip's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick manatees.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in turquoise.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never eat bark.