Rutkabtap is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, capable octopus.

Rutkabtap created a down quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Rutkabtap, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Rutkabtap, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Rutkabtap's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Rutkabtap's Holy Commandments

1. Rutkabtap loves ducks, so they must be respected.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never go into brown rooms.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Rutkabtap.