Mipjanpad is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, sapient lizard.

Mipjanpad created Mount Everest three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mipjanpad, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Mipjanpad, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Mipjanpad's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Mipjanpad's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three whales approach from the north.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always treat great tits with great respect.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.