Dissmotgud is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, omnipotent giraffe.

Dissmotgud created a charm quark six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dissmotgud, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dissmotgud, she will come to you in dreams.

Dissmotgud's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Dissmotgud's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat goats with great respect.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.

3. Run away if five foxes approach from the north.

4. Do not eat figs.

5. Always make sure there are no sharks in a room before entering it.