Waplambutrot is a god.

He takes the form of a small, unselfish salamander.

Waplambutrot created the world four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Waplambutrot, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Waplambutrot, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Waplambutrot's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Waplambutrot's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Retreat if five aardvarks approach from the north.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Pray towards the east.