Ladsitgen is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, uncaring gerbil.

Ladsitgen created a down quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ladsitgen, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Ladsitgen, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Ladsitgen's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Ladsitgen's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate porpoises.

2. Erect a giant carbon sculpture of Ladsitgen in the centre of the settlement.

3. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

4. Never hop in the presence of manatees.

5. Do not run in public.