Milyarbun is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, irritating crane.

Milyarbun created dark energy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Milyarbun, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Milyarbun, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Milyarbun's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Milyarbun's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from mauve otters for they are unholy.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.