Loopfetpom is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, effective seal.

Loopfetpom created matter three million years ago.

If you believe in Loopfetpom, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Loopfetpom, he will turn you into a rat.

Loopfetpom's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Loopfetpom's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of nuts to horses while wearing gray scarves.

2. Never write about ultrasonics.

3. Do not speak about melons.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

5. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in indigo.