Nigjarnyart is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, fussy alligator.

Nigjarnyart created a charm quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Nigjarnyart, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nigjarnyart, it will not care.

Nigjarnyart's most sacred site is Burras in England.

Nigjarnyart's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about solid mechanics.

2. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a room before entering it.

3. Never write about enzymes.

4. Erect a large iron sculpture of Nigjarnyart on top of all buildings.

5. Never play with disobedient children.