Rilfobnurl is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, prudent alligator.

Rilfobnurl created dark matter five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rilfobnurl, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Rilfobnurl, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Rilfobnurl's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Rilfobnurl's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat strawberries.

2. Never wear cyan dresses.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate frogs.