Mabtenvag is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, deceitful goblin.

Mabtenvag created humankind seven million years ago.

If you believe in Mabtenvag, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Mabtenvag, she will turn you into a duck.

Mabtenvag's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Mabtenvag's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Always wear plain boots during rituals.

3. Always obey Mabtenvag's priests.

4. Never write about black holes.

5. Do not prepare garlic while wearing hats.