Funbanbogtim is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, slow camel.

Funbanbogtim created a charm quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Funbanbogtim, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Funbanbogtim, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Funbanbogtim's most sacred site is Gomba in Hungary.

Funbanbogtim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear fawn clothing.

2. Retreat if seven hamsters approach from the north.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

4. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Never wear trousers.