Wikvadjam is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, deceitful squirrel.

Wikvadjam created a top quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Wikvadjam, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Wikvadjam, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Wikvadjam's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Wikvadjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Never paint your legs black.

3. Never write about chromosomes.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never jump in the presence of tapirs.