Kimortdav is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, proud jackal.

Kimortdav created Europe eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimortdav, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Kimortdav, she will turn you into a snail.

Kimortdav's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Kimortdav's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never talk about dogs.

4. Never think about photosynthesis.

5. Do not keep five turtles in a large pit.