Midnutfit is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, effective pig.

Midnutfit created the planet Jupiter three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Midnutfit, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Midnutfit, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Midnutfit's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Midnutfit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

2. Always treat seals with great respect.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Do not dye your hair mauve.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.