Dapwitpas is a god.

It takes the form of a large, clever wombat.

Dapwitpas created humankind six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dapwitpas, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Dapwitpas, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Dapwitpas' most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Dapwitpas' Holy Commandments

1. Never mention rats.

2. Do not speak about tomatoes.

3. Never feed pineapples to frogs while wearing shorts.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.