Gepwigwip is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, unfair crane.

Gepwigwip created matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gepwigwip, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gepwigwip, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Gepwigwip's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Gepwigwip's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Gepwigwip.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gepwigwip.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Always help gulls in need.