Gadcimkar Flyvidmat is a god.

He takes the form of a small, unthoughtful chicken.

Gadcimkar Flyvidmat created an up quark eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gadcimkar Flyvidmat, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Gadcimkar Flyvidmat, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Gadcimkar Flyvidmat's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Gadcimkar Flyvidmat's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine frogs approach from the west.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

4. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gadcimkar Flyvidmat.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.