Wotbopgen is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, intelligent snake.

Wotbopgen created carbon nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wotbopgen, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Wotbopgen, she will turn you into a rock.

Wotbopgen's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Wotbopgen's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in fawn.

2. Never write about amino acids.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Never eat tomatoes.