Appsomvog is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, awe-inspiring porpoise.

Appsomvog created the Sombrero Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Appsomvog, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Appsomvog, she will be mildly annoyed.

Appsomvog's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Appsomvog's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Appsomvog.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Do not kill dolphins.

5. Always stare at clouds.