Ligveenvag is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, benevolent bear.

Ligveenvag created Africa six million years ago.

If you believe in Ligveenvag, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Ligveenvag, she will try to impress you with trees.

Ligveenvag's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Ligveenvag's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Ligveenvag must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Hide from blue shrews for they are unholy.

4. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Hide if eight mice approach from the south.